old notebooks pt. 1

posting the contents of old notebooks just to have them; notebooks get lost easy. no one really reads this anyway

cardboard, bound with brass; indiscriminate stain on cover outlined in pen

circa spring '09, probably

most of this is prompted

---

1.
a featherfall into semi-consciousness
like, ambling/limping into hypnogogia
suddenly, slowly, yr thoughts just
fuckin' turn to images while you
lie there restless, beastly dead.
realize that when yr sight goes
cobalt that you are undergoing this
metempsychosis of yrself in which
everything you subconsciously grapple
w/ is suddenly eraserhead 2, or
some thing equally as tempestuous.

2.
KILL HIM INTO A BETTER GUY
I AM NOT RUNNING

"HEY! COME DOWN FROM THERE!"

..I AM NOT RUNNING
....I AM NOT RUNNING
......I AM NOT RUNNING
BY SUCH

3.
slant, soon heavy w/ conversation
we watch as the dull grey wing of some bird
obliquely slices thru a span insistent upon its blue
deft; accusatory.....the
coffee is grey too.....we know that
he masturbated that morning

4.
CLOSE CIRCUIT CAMERAS
brick walls, a square of clear blue
sky, two laughing gulls, marbled pink
bouncy ball, brown/grey carpet w/
cigarette burns, candleholder/ashtray
full of tar/rainwater, used condom in
the trashcan, stolen black beanie w/
hole at the top, a cockatiel, sun-
glasses, boxing glove, digital
camera, a human-sized indent in the
bushes, garden hose, black cloak,
half a face face split in half one
speaking one's mouth moving, ironic
sneer, purple shirt, yellow shirt,
same shirt from last night, same
pants every day, acid stomach, twitching
eye/chest/legs, sleeping pills, half
a day gone before you even realize
it, thought i was dying, knew i
was dying, throat tight, sleep
forever, may pretty horses come to
you before you wake

5.


TIME

6.
They dreamt wan of horses, truncating,
their legs were ornamented. they
came on decanted shells. Evangeline
sewed her dog an asshole (entirely
abnormal). its head begged the tail
"do not leave me alone
with this thing unless no
alternatives exist